It’s kind of funny that honesty has gotten me into awkward situations at times, but lying will cause you much more trouble. Some people think it’s alright to fib a little or stretch the truth so when does it become a lie and when does it become hurtful?

Depending on the person you ask you’ll get a different opinion on what is right and what is wrong. A survey that was taken in 2008 found that nearly 70% of the people polled thought it was alright to take office supplies home with them. Isn’t that stealing? Someone might take a pen and think nothing of it, but then where do you draw the line? Most of us wouldn’t think much about taking a pen. If another co-worker sees you take home a pen then they take home a case of pens I think we can see the difference but either way it’s still stealing.

Still I think honesty is the best policy. One reason you should be honest is to avoid hurting other people. You might think what you say to one person will be kept between you and that person, but eventually everything seems to have a way of working back around to the person you were talking about. So, if you have something troubling you about that person why wouldn’t you just go talk to that person instead of telling someone else?

Chances are you are afraid of how the other person will react. Sometimes people will be rational and other times not. I have tried to be an honest person and it’s cause me to lose friends at times. But I think if those people were true friends they would have stayed my friends.

I had an incident that took place years ago. I was going through a divorce and my neighbors husband came knocking on my door drunk at 2am. I was a friend of his wife and had no idea it was him. I called the police thinking it was someone else and when the police pulled up in front of the house my friend’s husband said “Cindy let me in the police are here” and he told me who he was.

Shocked and confused that it was him and embaressed I had called the police I let him in and flagged the police it was ok,since I still had the 911 operator on the phone I told her everything was ok. It was only after I let him that I smelled the beer on him. He then began to ask if he could sleep on my couch since his wife was mad and locked him out. He went on saying how it was cold outside.

He had woken my kids, the dogs were barking and I didn’t really know what to do but tell him it was ok. I told him that he needed to tell his wife because I didn’t want other neighbors to see him leave and get the wrong impression. He agreed.

The next day since I was good friends with his wife we spoke on the phone daily. I called her and we were talking and I asked if her husband had talked to her. She immediately became defensive and angry and wanted to know about what. I knew in an instant he had not told her. I spoke to an elder of a local church and asked their advice and she agreed with me.

I gave the husband a second chance to talk to his wife about the fact that nothing had happened and he refused to tell her anything. So I explained everything to her and it seemed my honesty broke our friendship. I think it was easier for her to direct her anger at me than at her husband.

I’ve had a few times when I was just completely upfront and honest with people and it seemed to blow up in my face. I still think honesty is best. I won’t say that I’m perfect and that I never lie, because that would be a lie. I do strive to be as honest as possible.

I was talking to my daughter one day about lies and honesty. We talked about how sometimes you’ll be telling a story about something that happened to you and something in the story becomes slightly exaggerated. There’s no real reason for the exaggeration but you do it anyhow. Like you might say “I ate three hamburgers” when you only ate two. I’ve now started catching myself when that happens and I’ll say, “oh no I lied it was only two”. It’s easy enough to fix it right when you know you’ve said the wrong thing. If you wait too long to correct what you’ve said a little lie can become something big.

Later down the road you might be telling the same story to someone else and the person you told it to before is standing there. If you change your story again then you’ll look bad in front of the person who has already heard your story. So even just telling a little white lie or small exaggeration can ruin your integrety and reputation.