Good manners are about respect. They are what makes a society function smoothly: it is the lubricant for social interaction. We are living in a society after all!

Showing good manners, using please and thank you, smiling and greeting someone etc are all ways of showing respect for the person you are interacting with and indicating in a subtle way to them that they are important to you and that you are acknowledging their feelings. Everyone wants to feel acknowledged and respected. All social situations would be more pleasant if people would show this kind of consideration for each other.

Good manners have fallen by the way side in life today as our culture is more concerned with speed over substance, getting things done more quickly, at the expense of quality or care. It is faster to push someone out the way, whether physically or emotionally, than to bother to take the time to respect them , to put in a bit of effort to be pleasant. This is all part of our ‘fast food’ culture and the ‘me me me’ culture. Parents often seem to put their children in front of the TV rather than spend time with them, teaching them how to go on in life. And of course children learn how to treat others and talk to them from watching their parents. So the decline of manners continues.

How much does it cost you to say thank you? Or to add the word please onto the end of a request? How nice does it feel when someone actually smiles at you or takes the trouble to say hello? In actual fact it also feels nice to be the one to bestow a kind word, it feels great, a bit like giving to charity. It can brighten a person’s whole day if they are feeling bad abotu anything. It reminds them there are good people out there, that people do care, that society does still exist. It feels warm and friendly to both parties.

This is a problem at work too, with senior managers not bothering with the ‘little people’, why greet them or make them feel special when they are that unimportant to the company? But be nice to those you meet on the way up, you may just see them again on your way down. And the words ‘to the company’ are the ones to think about. It is not about the company it is about one human being to another. We are all together on this earth, as equals, so let us be nice to eachother - it will make us all have a happier day!