Are you tolerant? If you cannot honestly answer yes, it would be totally unrealistic and unfair to think that your children will be tolerant.

As parents, if we want to make a true impact on our kids regarding tolerance and intolerance, we must first be willing to set an example for them. Even very young children can see right through lies. Frankly, we don’t give kids enough credit for their abilities and intelligence. A child may not be so bold as to actually tell us when they know that we are lying, but they know it. Kids are probably far more sharp than the majority of adults, since they haven’t yet been tainted.

We must also be willing to talk to them about such issues, openly and again honestly. This means real communication, not just a one sided statement or two. We must be willing to talk to them about those things that might lead to intolerance, and WE must have open minds. Both sides should be given clearly and logically. Coupled with our own actions, children are very capable of making up their own minds.

“Mommy, why don’t people talk to that nice black man?”, or “Why do people hate Muslims?” should be treated as extremely valid and important questions. It is only fair to at least make an attempt to say what some people think, and what others think as well. We actually don’t have to say what we think. Kids are smart enough to know the difference, even when they are just old enough to ask the question.

Children must learn to know that individuals can be bad, but groups of individuals seldom are. A bad white man, black man, Christian, Muslim, Japanese, American do exist, but this doesn’t make any difference to the majority of the color, religion, or nationality. Most people, regardless of group, are going to be good and helpful. To teach our kids, first, we need to understand this ourselves, and second, we must be willing to talk to the kids about it. Presenting just one side of the argument does not embrace tolerance, and neither does dishonesty.

We can teach our kids many things, and in the process, they can teach us many things. Are they not worth it? Are you not worth it? So…let’s all do it!