Responsibility Taking less Responsibility Deflecting Placing Blame who is to Blame why

Ask yourself how many times you’ve heard the following words: “It’s not my fault.” Perhaps it’s cute when a four year old child looks at you after dropping a bowl of cheerios on the floor. What happens when the four year old becomes President of the United States and invades a Country under false pretenses? The reality is there is this sweeping mainstream point of view suggesting a need for someone to blame in any unsavory event. Politicians deflect questions regarding systemic, economic, and party failures by personally attacking the credibility of other candidates, parties, businesses and any other entity at their disposal in order to make themselves look less culpable. The sad reality is not so much that politicians lie but the fact that there are so many willing to buy the goods that they are selling. The easiest explanation for this mind boggling phenomena is that there are many people that use this same fallacious use of logic in their every day lives.

I want to believe that most people are intelligible beings capable of free will and take advantage of the abundance of resources found on the internet to satisfy almost any question posed. However, I’m reminded of a statement a friend of mine mentioned to me the other day. Think about a conversation you’ve had with a person you would deem of average intellect. Consider that 50% of people are less intelligent than that person. Think about the last headline you read. Did you read the headline and suddenly form an opinion on the basis of the headline alone or did you delve deeper into the story and research prior to taking a stance? If you are anyway like me, you are guilty of reading no further on the topic on several occasions. The sobering truth is most people are lazy. You might be asking yourself: “Random guy on the Internet what does this have to do with taking responsibility for myself?” The answer is it has everything to do with yourself. You have the responsibility to educate yourself. How can we continue to evolve as a human race without being informed? Furthermore, arguably being selfish in nature, how can you evolve without a thirst for knowledge?

I’m reminded of an ex-girlfriend of mine. She became angered over trivial situations. That seems vague and subjective so I will clarify by example. She came over to my apartment, sat on the floor next to my couch and said nothing. I attempted to speak with her and asked her to sit on the couch. She refused and sat idly. I proceeded to check my email at which point she stated it’s rude to go on the computer when you have guests. Being the peacekeeper I am, I apologized and asked her if she would like to talk to me about what’s on her mind. She refused to speak and so after a short period of time I said I am going back to my email. She immediately left my apartment and went for a smoke outside. I followed. Trying to speak with her about her issues, she deflected the issue by talking about killing a spider the other day. This was infuriating. I told her I think this relationship is over as she won’t even try to deal with her issues. She had one thing to say: “It takes time to change” It is true, it does take time. Unfortunately, it also takes effort. This may be an extreme example, but I think it says a lot about western culture. We seem to believe there is someone else to blame for our current state. My ex did have a difficult past involving a terribly abusive father. I am not diminishing the effects of this on her psyche. I am not saying she should take responsibility for her father’s actions. I am saying that the only road to self-actualization involves taking responsibility for yourself. We must educate ourselves and find others that help us mend and strive. Life is difficult but defense mechanisms can only take you so far. I’m not saying I am perfect. Far from it. In fact, I find myself trying to improve myself at every corner. The first step is admitting when I’m wrong. Integrity has value in my life and I certainly hope it has meaning in yours. I wish you all the best in your mental health and best of luck on your quest towards self-actualization.