It’s hard to accept that people change, people grow apart, and they no longer want to be together. It’s hard, as many have been through this. Sometimes it breaks your heart because you can’t imagine your life without them, and sometimes you’re on the other end of the stick noticing this is happening. But sometimes, both of you are oblivious to what’s going on, and other times you’re confused. Do you want to stay with them and try to make this better or do you want to move on and find someone new? The answer to both these questions are tricky, but here are five signs to tell if your relationship is over.

The first sign is the trust is gone. If you have to wonder what they’re doing every single moment they’re away from you, then you two obviously never built or have lost your trust for eachother. Trust is the glue of the relationship. If you two are comfortable enough knowing that one another is okay, but you don’t have to know where they are at all times, then your trust is fine. But, if you always have to question whatever they’re doing, where they are, and who they’re with, then your trust has fizzled out. Now, you can do one of two things if this is your problem: a). You can try to rebuild the trust. This is the way to save your relationship. Now, it’s going to be tricky, but if you want it bad enough then you’ll be able to do it. What you need to do is be honest and take responsibility for your own actions and decisions. Talk, communicate, and listen to them. Maybe they see the problem like you do. And give it time. Don’t expect it to change overnight. b). You can just let the relationship go. That’s the easiest option. It’s better not to lose trust to begin with.

The second sign is constant fighting. This eats away at both your happiness, and though a lot of couples know this, they’re still neck-and-neck with each other. This is normal in every relationship, but too much can head to unhappiness and hate. So, consider this: Have either of you tried to stop it? Have either of you taken any initiative to get out of the fight or before you see one coming? If not, then both of you need to either step it up or step down. Here’s what you need to do: Relax and take some time for yourself. Sometimes being together constantly is half the problem. You get sick of each other, then bounce off each other. Determine the cause of your fighting. If it’s something stupid, then make sure you don’t get upset over it. Train yourself to let things go, and likewise your partner. Talk to them about your fighting when both of you are calm. Half the battle is both of you knowing how the other feels about things. Make a plan to keep the fighting under control. You may have to compromise, but remember: this isn’t just about you. Agree to disagree. Some couples don’t see eye-to-eye and it’s just that simple. Get professional help. If you and your partner are still fighting after all this, go to counseling. And if that doesn’t work the next best option is to get out of the relationship.

The third sign is you’d rather be working than be around them. That’s not normal. If you really hate being around your partner that much, then something is wrong. Obviously they’re doing something you don’t like or you’re just sick of them. So, here’s what to do about this one: Go on a romantic date and go back in time to when you were happy. That may remind you of how special they are to you. Do something fun together, like go to a fair or a party. You’d be amazed what wonders that does for couples. Sometimes all they need is reminded about what they’re missing out on. Remember, work doesn’t come before your partner. Your partner comes before work.

The fourth sign is not being able to recall good memories. If you can’t remember the good times you’ve had with your partner or the good things about them, it’s time for a reality check. They’re still there, they’re still with you because they’re happy with you. They can list 100 things they love about you and 50 good memories you two have had together. When you look at those lists and think: “We did that?” then it’s time for you to wake up. Bad memories have clouded up your past with them and now you’re not only making their life miserable, but yours as well. Think about how they feel when they see your face when you read those lists, how in shock you were as you tried to remember those memories, but couldn’t. Here’s what you need to do: Make more good memories. Have a picnic in the park. Camp out. Go to a party. Go out to dinner. You can do anything to make good memories, but this time, make sure you remember them.

The fifth and final sign is they’re showing signs that they’re cheating on you. That isn’t good. Not only does it raise red-flags, but it also lets you know that they are no longer interested in you. Are they coming home late? Are they making up lame excuses for where they have been? What if the phone rings and they won’t let you answer it? You probably already know it, but you don’t want to admit it to yourself. So here’s what to do: Tell them straight-up that you’re leaving. Even if they’re not cheating on you, the relationship is unhealthy and you need to get out of it. If they try to tell you they aren’t cheating and nothing’s wrong, just leave anyway. It isn’t good for you. It may be hard, but it’ll make you feel a thousand times better once you get out of there and start living your life again with no worries about where your partner is and what they’re doing.

Remember, none of these signs mean your relationship is over or can’t be fixed. It takes both of you to fix the problem, and you can, but only if you want to and your relationship will be back to normal again. But if one of you doesn’t want to fix it, then you need to get out of there fast. Only you two can decide if your relationship is over, but remember to think about what’s healthy for you, and if you’d be better off without them. To many people, the stunning answer is yes. But, it’s up to you and your partner on what you two need to do and if you can fix it.