Britain has become an increasingly multi cultural nation in the past thirty years. This is particularly evident in ultra cosmopolitan cities such as London, Manchester, and Edinburgh, and this trend towards multiculturalism has been boosted by the European Union’s freedom of movement protections. If one were to sample a London primary school class, you’d probably find a mix of white, black, and Asian kids, plus kids from Eastern European families. Given this rapid demographic evolution, it’s become increasingly difficult to pin down the whole nation’s social customs.

Traditional British social customs:

Even if we look at traditional British social customs, it’s important to note that they are not uniform across the whole of Britain. The land mass of Britain is comprised of three separate nations (England, Scotland, and Wales) who all have their own distinct cultural uniqueness and social customs. Britain is also a place where social class divisions still exist (though appreciably less so than in previous centuries) and social customs that are observed by the upper or middle classes may not be observed by the working classes, and vice versa.

With those couple of caveats in place, here is a general summary of some of the traditional British social customs:

Handshake greeting:

Whether you are greeting a stranger in a pub or a client in a business meeting, the British standard greeting is a firm handshake. Even close family members will often employ this fairly formal greeting style, in favour over emotional hug or kiss greetings.

A firm handshake is important as a weak handshake may give the impression that you’re not to be trusted. Additionally, the handshake shouldn’t last more than a few seconds. Continue holding onto a  British person’s hand any longer than that and they are likely to get anxious!  

Important note: Never great a British person with French style kisses on either cheek unless you are amongst the theatre fraternity.

Never talk to strangers (especially on public transport):

Anyone who has ever been on the London Tube will have experienced this strange phenomenon. A carriage of commuters may be packed in like sardines, forcing you to a level of physical intimacy normally only reserved for lovers. However woe betide anyone who decides to spark a conversation with one of their fellow citizens.

Note: There is one generally excepted exception to this rule. It is often just about permissible to discuss the weather – see below:

Talking about the weather:

There are some countries where the weather is very predictable and this reduces opportunities for weather-based conversations. “The weather’s hot today” must become rather boring after the thirtieth consecutive day in Greece, whilst “I see it’s snowing” might get short change during an Icelandic winter.

In contrast to this, the weather is extremely variable and unpredictable in Britain. If we delve back into the mists of time, the weather conditions would have been crucial to the wellbeing of British people. Too wet or too cold a winter might have a devastating effect upon crops, so it’s easy to understand how the topic of weather came to be elevated to such heights across all the British social strata.

It continues to be important today, as it may scupper plans for a trip to the beach or to have a game of tennis, or (as happened recently) may bring the transport system to a grinding halt if a few inches of snow descends.

If you’re a tourist wishing to strike up conversation with a British person, talking about the weather may be a good safe starting point. Just be aware that saying something like “We’ve had continuous sunshine this month” may not immediately endear you to a British person who’s had to put up with wind, rain, and more rain.

Tea breaks:

This is maybe a declining social custom but you will still find it in some offices around Britain. After a couple of hours work, you will find that your British co-workers will down their tools and gravitate to the tea dispensing machine. They will then sit down for ten minutes (and not a second longer) and will either talk about the weather or read their newspaper. Another tea break will be observed at 3pm in the afternoon, with the same rituals being observed. The dunking of digestive biscuits often accompanies the slurping of tea.

Note: The pernicious foreign custom to drinking coffee has gradually crept into British society but is not to be encouraged.

Going to the pub:

In ye olde Britain, there was a curious tradition of attending church services. This quaint custom declined rapidly during the 20th century but another British custom still thrives and sometimes takes on quasi religious importance. I’m talking, of course, about the custom of going to a British pub.

Pubs are often the hub of a community, especially in the smaller towns and villages. People go to pubs to drink beer, watch football (never call it “soccer”), and talk about the weather. After a few drinks, an interesting change comes over British people, as talk about the weather subsides to be replaced either by raucous debate over favourite football teams, or saucy talk about members of the opposite sex.

Men and women tend to congregate in separate groups and approaches from a member of one gender to the other should only be attempted once sufficiently drunk.

Frydays:

Friday’s are frydays, when British people try to overcome their miserable weather-induced depression by coating their hearts with layers of fried fat. The day starts with a bacon buttie (pieces of fried bacon in a buttered white roll) into which either tomato ketchup or (in Scotland) brown sauce is added.

Then, either at lunch-time or dinner-time, a fish supper must be ordered. A fish supper is what most other nationalities might refer to as fish and fries. British people use the word “chips” instead of fries, perhaps in an attempt to ignore the fact that they’re eating more unhealthy fried food. The fish, by the way, should be fried in batter, and the whole ensemble will be coated in salt, vinegar, and either the ubiquitous tomato ketchup or brown sauce.  

Singing and shouting at football and rugby matches:

People from countries such as the US, Australia, France, or Italy, must find British people quite reserved in their polite social customs. It therefore sometimes comes as a surprise when non-Britons attend their first football or rugby match, and find a heaving mass of bodies passionately singing and shouting for 90 or so minutes.

Football is the national passion of the Scots and English, whilst rugby union performs the same role for the Welsh. As with the London Tube, you may find yourself crammed in amongst a massive crowd of sweating bodies. However, a very interesting difference can be observed. Instead of steadfastly ignoring each other, the congregated masses suddenly become hugely animated. Songs are belted out, usually pertaining to the famous successes of their team or the ineptitude of the opposing team. Players on both sides, and especially the referee, come in for streams of colourful invective, with a particularly Anglo-Saxon swear word being thrown around liberally.

Football also provides a loophole to the general “no personal contact” rule. When a goal is scored, it is perfectly permissible to scoop one’s neighbouring fan up into a bear hug and start dancing hand-in-hand on the terraces. Non-Britons should note, however, that this exemption is only granted when a goal is scored and expires after about 30 seconds. Continuing to embrace after this cut-off point may cause grave offence!   

Summary:

I’ve provided a light-hearted overview of some of the traditional British social customs. It is important to stress again, however, that the views expressed fall very much within the gambit of social stereotypes. As with most stereotypes, there is an element of truth to them but you shouldn’t expect to find all these traits shared by all British people that you meet! Indeed, the best approach would be to come over here and sample Britain for yourself. Just bring a raincoat!