An increasing number of couples are deciding to have children without getting married to one another. There is less of a stigma attached to having a child outside of wedlock than there used to be and since many couples live together before getting married, anyway, often marriage isn’t seen as particularly important. Marriage may be a symbol of commitment, but what bigger commitment is there than having a child together? For many couples, marriage represents an outdated institution that costs a fortune to stage.

Of course, not everyone feels this way about marriage. Some couples look forward to the day they can cement their relationship in stone and celebrate their big day with loved ones. There are those who believe that marriage should come before children, so that they wait until they are married before trying to conceive. For many, it is religious beliefs that guide their decision to get married, although romance and more pragmatic matters, such as money, are often factored in.

Not everyone feels that marriage is for them, though. Although times have changed, some individuals still regard marriage to represent a system which favours men over women. There are men and women who perceive marriage to be old-fashioned and not something they want to enter into, but who still want to have children. Children are unlikely to face bullying and discrimination because they are ‘illegitimate’ and so many parents do not consider the possibility that remaining unmarried could be an issue for their children.

Marriage does offer a certain amount of security for those involved, though, as everyone knows where they stand, legally. For couples who decide not to marry, there is always the danger that something could go wrong and there will be no legal protection for either partner. It might be tempting not to consider all the bad things that could happen, such as your relationship breaking down or your partner dying prematurely, but when these events occur, it is much more difficult to prove what you’re entitled to.

Getting married doesn’t necessarily mean a relationship is going to last forever, but most couples work hard to make their marriage work. It is generally perceived as easier to end a relationship when there is nothing legally to get in your way. Children are a major commitment that you can’t just give up on because you’re in an unhappy relationship. At the end of the day, it shouldn’t really matter whether couples are married before having children, or not, as long as the children are well-looked after and loved.