Placing Blame for the Problems in a Childs Life – No

Children are taught personal values from the time they are born. It is true that at some point these children will try things they know very well are not in their best interest.  This is a normal activity for children with even the best upbringing.

Placing the blame for poor behavior on children is a common fault that parents make.  These are simply parents who have a hard time dealing with the reality that their children are simply experiencing being their own person.  As a mother of two, I have done the same thing, from blaming the friends they are associating with, the music they listen to, to the violence in the games they play.

It took some time to realize that all children will stray from their original teachings and choose to experience a piece of the life they will soon discover is not for them.  Since every child is different, they will all learn at their own pace.  What the parent should be grateful for is that they are going through these experiences while still in the safety net of their home and family support.  Once the child is of age and on their own they have a more difficult time seeing the pros and cons of their behavior, and no one can tell them any different at this point.

Blaming television, music and computer games is simply a way to take the blame from the parent in their own eyes. Some children do not have a good family foundation and the messages being sent by these influences may seem to present a life or support that they do not get at home. 

It is not uncommon for children to want to experience everything they can in life; many will say that those who don’t were simply raised on fear. Allowing a child to venture into the unknown is a way of allowing them to grow and learn to cultivate their own problem solving skills. Cheating your child out of this opportunity is not fair.  As a parent you must talk with your child and make sure that they are aware of the repercussions of their decisions and choices.

It is by no means easy to watch your children suffer from these choices. On the other hand, it is not easy to face the fact your adult child is needy and not self- sufficient because you have sheltered them from real life events. While these events may be difficult to go through, they will make your child a more well-rounded human being.