How Personal Morals get in the way of Close Relationships


My personal morals are pretty much set. Even when I was running hog wild, I had sensitivities and beliefs which prevented me from doing many things.

I had to get married and divorced 4 times before I finally figured it out.

In my way of thinking, close relationships get in the way of personal morals. People who are sacrificing their very conscience to maintain a close relationship are miserable. In no way am I suggesting that I am a perfectly moral person. I’m not. But I do have certain moral boundaries which I am not going to erase.

Last night, I rented The Bourne Identity. I’ve seen the movie once before, but I got to thinking about it and thought that it would be a good movie for my son to watch. It has action, it is intellectually engaging and it has a great moral. Jason Bourne found out the hard way what he was not capable of and it took fighting fire with fire to get out of immediate danger, though, I assume that in that particular situation, he’d always have to watch his back.

My son loved the movie. It was fascinating to him. We discussed Jason Bourne and how cool he was. How right on tough he was. How he could have been killed and how altered his life was forever. How he had no one to trust and every face he saw was his potential enemy. How to a certain extent, real life is like that.

If you don’t know yourself, then how do you know what you are capable of? How do you know what your personal morals are? People are learning more and more about themselves everyday, the hard way.

Know yourself. That’s what I told my son. Don’t try to be too righteous, why die before your time. But by all means, know yourself. Don’t let anyone define who you are, I told him. You belong to You.

I couldn’t have done it, I told my son. He said he could not have. No way.

It is very human to consider sins and crimes. It is a very human part of growing and finding yourself. Even becoming an assassin should be very well considered. Creative thinking, critical thinking, analyzations are necessary. My son has known what it means to be bullied. To be used and ill treated. He has put it all behind him. He will be taking the high road.

I’m quite sure that he will be very selective in his personal relationships. In his decisions throughout life he will have a knowledge base to draw from, unlittered by white trash tales and hick psychology.

Sometimes, Hollywood puts out some fine creative work. Films to make people think and reflect upon who and what they really are. We tough people appreciate those works of art. Distantly, of course.