Friendship Friends Part of your Life Essential Forever Reason Season

There is an email that circulates every few months stating that “some friends are in your heart for a reason, a season, or a lifetime”. Think about all your friends.   Can you distinguish among those who are (or have been) there for a reason? A season? A lifetime?

Do you use Facebook or Twitter? How many “friends” are listed on your page? Are they truly friends or have you friended them because they know someone you want to know or be like? Those people aren’t real friends, they are acquaintances. Can you determine which ones are there for a reason?

Perhaps you have started an exercise program and wanted another person to work with you so that the person knows what you are going through and will work side by side with you and be your friend. Many times that person will remain a friend for life. However, even more of them will drift away after you both finish with your exercise program. It won’t be because the two of you came to dislike each other, but rather because that person was there for a reason, and that reason has passed.

Another reason could be when you go through a divorce and need someone non-judgmental with whom you can talk about all the conflict and upheaval that is happening to you. Once you have settled upon a lifestyle for yourself after the divorce, that friend may not be as close, or become one of your friends for life. You won’t realize at the time this person steps into your life what type of friend they will be, that will come with time.

What about seasonal friends? Do you have a child, or children, in school? Do they have friends whose parents you have become friends with? Are your children on a team and you see the parents at every game and become friends? These people are potential seasonal friends. Once your child has graduated, or is no longer involved in sports, these friendships may slowly dissolve. You may keep in touch periodically, but not the constant contact that was the norm when your children were together.

Friends, be they in your life for a reason or a season, are essential to our well- being, self-esteem and the very lives we lead. If you are fortunate enough to have a friend who is there for a lifetime you are truly blessed. They are important because they give your life continuity, someone you can count on no matter what. Aristotle is credited with this statement regarding friends: “What is a friend but a single soul in two bodies”.

Do you have friends from childhood or school that you haven’t seen since you, or they, moved away or finished school? What would happen if you were to call that person out of the blue because you felt like it was extremely important that you talk with this person now? Do you know how they would react to your unexpected telephone call?

If they are lifetime friend they will be at your side as soon as possible. If they are (or were) there for a reason or a season, they will listen to you, but probably won’t react with the alacrity of a lifetime friend. True friends can go years without seeing each other or even talking to each other. When they pick up the phone and the two friends begin to talk, it is as if they just saw each other yesterday. An anonymous quote sums up the epitome of a true friend by saying, “a friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words”. Every person should have at least one friend who can sing his/her song.